Mandi's Top 10 Pet Peeves....(with all the typos fixed!)

As I was using the facilities at my college today, I was reminded how much little things can really irritate you.  So I thought I would share with you all, my loyal blog readers, my top 10 list of pet peeves....

1)  Single-ply toilet tissue.  Especially when it is dispensed on one of those stupid rollers that only give you 3 sheets at a time.  What the crap!?  It takes more than three sheets to do the job correctly!

2)  Not rinsing dishes properly and leaving them in the sink overnight.  I am sorry but rice crispies, soup, just about anything turns to concrete and is virtually impossible to remove if left overnight!  How difficult is it to rinse a dish?

3)  Talking on cell phones in bathroom stalls.  I mean what the hay!?  I don't want to hear you tell your friends about your hot date while I am trying to do my business.  Besides, it makes you look like your are talking to yourself or worse me!  Oh, how I loathe answering the next stall when they aren't speaking to me!

4)  Clearing your throat or sniffing constantly--especially in a library.  Ugh, can we say RICOLLA!?

5)  IPOD, MP3, etc. blaring  They are called PERSONAL music devices for a reason.  I don't want to hear your "insert your style of music", thank you very much!

6)  People that let their children destroy stores or other people's homes.  If you can't make Johnny/Susie behave, keep 'em confined to the shopping cart and don't bring them to my house!

7)  Smacking/Chewing loudly with one's mouth full. I do not want to see and/or hear what you are eating!  That is just plain gross!

8)  While on the subject of eating, this one really burns me up!  People taking their kids to fancy/nice restaurants (those where the atmosphere is quiet and dim and the food costs more than $25 per entree) and letting them act like hoodlums!  If they can't be quiet and respectful (I know my two year old can't) Wait until they are older and have more self control to take them to Che La Tee Da!  I don't want to spend my hard earned "child-free" evening out listening to your little dev...um, I mean child!

9)  Talking while a professor/speaker/teacher is lecturing/speaking/teaching.  This is so rude!  If you can't wait until class is over--then leave!  I am paying to get a good education, not hear about last night's conquests or drunken binge!  UGH!

10)  Finally, going to school/store/restaurant/anywhere besides your home in bedroom slippers/pajamas/curlers!  I mean how hard is it to throw on a pair of jeans/jean skirt, a tee shirt, flip-flops and a hat!  I mean that is only, what 4 pieces of clothing! Anyone has the time to manage that!

Bonus Pet Peeves---
Professors/People that use Power Point presentations only to read it directly from the monitor.  I can read! I don't need to come to your class/meeting if you are going to just read to me!

People that take their children out in public in nothing but a diaper.  That is just gross! And while on that subject, how hard is it to take a hankie to that green gunk flowing from your child's nose...I mean, really people, come on!

I will now get off my soapbox! I feel better!  Now tell me some of your pet peeves!

Ta-ta!
Mandi

7 Reasons Not To Mess With Children

This is from an email my sister in law sent me.  It was so cute, I thought I would share with my blog readers!!

  A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.

 The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.

The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.

Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.

The little girl said, 'When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah'.

The teacher asked, 'What if Jonah went to hell?'

The little girl replied, 'Then you ask him'.



  A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.

As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.

The girl replied, 'I'm drawing God.' 

The teacher paused and said, 'But no one knows what God looks like.'

Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, 'They will in a minute.'


     A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.

After explaining the commandment to 'honour' thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, 'Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?'

From the back,  one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, 'Thou shall not kill.'



  One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. 

She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, 'Why are some of your hairs white, Mum?'

Her mother replied, 'Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.'

The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, 'Mummy, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?'
 

 I love this one!
     The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.

'Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.'

A small voice at the back of the room rang out, 'And there's the teacher, she's dead.'

  A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, 'Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face.'

'Yes,' the class said. 

'Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?'

A little fellow shouted, 
'Cause your feet ain't empty.'

I LIKE THE NEXT ONE IN PARTICULAR

   The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:

'Take only ONE . God is watching.' 

Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.

A child had written a note, 'Take all you want. God is watching the apples.'

   

Grits and gravy and greens, oh, my!!

Maybe it is because I am on a diet.  Or maybe it is because I am just a tiny bit homesick for my native state, But I am having some serious cravings for Southern cuisine.   I mean I want some real, honest to goodness, stick to your ribs southern cookin'!!

I want grits.  Creamy and buttery.  Seasoned to perfection with a bit of salt. 

Or how about some really good greens.  Collard, mustard, turnip...you name it. I want it boiled with some smoked turkey!  Served with cornbread (not sweet) and hot pepper sauce.

OR better yet, how about some fried green  tomatoes.   Crisped to perfection with the right combination of flour and corn meal.  Dipped in a spicy remalade sauce.  

Or biscuits.  My grandma's biscuits.  Loaded with butter.  While I am on the topic of Grammy I am now thinking about tea cakes...a crazy concoction that is more like a cookie than a cake.  They are melt in your mouth delicious.  She uses real cane syrup!!  Yum!

Better still....homemade macaroni and cheese.  Fluffy, eggy, cheesy....yum! 


I don't know if this blog post accomplished anything but making me drool...what about you!?

Ta-ta-
Manda

What it means (to me) to be a Christian....

I am not writing this to alienate any of my readers.  I know that we all do not share the same faith.  But my faith is such an important part of my life that I must address it. 

I have been told by strangers that there is something "different" about me.  There is some sort of unseen light that kind of comes through me.  I am convinced that this is my faith in Christ shining through.  Matthew 5:16 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.

I have also been asked, "How on earth can you praise a God that allows such terrible things happen?"  I am reminded that without the bad we could never appreciate the good.  If we never knew what sadness was, we could never enjoy happiness.  If we always have plenty, we can never fully appreciate it, without first knowing what it is like to do without.  Isaiah 25:1-4 ¹O Lord, thou art my God; I will exalt thee, I will praise thy name; for thou hast done wonderful things; thy counsels of old are faithfulness and truth. For thou hast made of a city an heap; of a defenced city a ruin: a palace of strangers to be no city; it shall never be built.   Therefore shall the strong people glorify thee, the city of the terrible nations shall fear thee.    For thou hast been a strength to the poor, a strength to the needy in his distress, a refuge from the storm, a shadow from the heat, when the blast of the terrible ones is as a storm against the wall.

I praise my Lord Jesus through it all.  That doesn't mean that it is easy for me.  There are times when I a get so angry at God and cry out, "WHY!!?"  And just when I am at the point where I don't think I can take it anymore, His goodness and grace surrounds me and provides me with what I need.  Sometimes He even provides me with something I didn't even know I needed.  Phillipians 4:19 But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.

Sometimes I am overwhelmed and I have to remind myself to be still. To let my faith carry me.  To realize that I, as a woman, cannot do it all.  I have to depend on something bigger than myself. 

I am a control freak, by nature!  I feel completely out of control when I am not in control.  It is something I have struggled with my entire life.  I always have to be the best.  The best dressed.  The best student. The best wife.  The best mother.  You name it, I have to be the best.   But the older I get the more I am reminded that the importance should not be placed on being the best, but trying my best.  I may not always make the A or have children with perfect outfits and hair or be on every committee at my church and school and juggle it all with everything else, although I have tried! 

What matters most is the love of Christ shining through me.  Reaching out to everybody  I meet.  They may not agree with my faith, but they know it exists and are able to respect me for it.  My faith in Christ is what has carried me all these years.  Through the bad marriage, family strife, going back to school in my thirties, self doubt, self loathing, you name it, my faith will cover it. 

I am not a mindless, shell of a person blindly following a demanding and judgemental God.  I choose to follow my Lord.  I made the decision on my own.  I am at peace with my faith yet I am always wanting to learn more.  Life is good.  And so is the love of Christ!

I hope I haven't offended anyone.  I just wanted to let everyone know how it feels to be a person totally in love with Christ and all His promises for me!

Ta-ta!
Manda

Two year olds...

I am simply amazed, on a day to day basis, at what my two year old is capable of.  Whether it be standing on a rocking horse, while holding two color pencils in the middle of a dark room .  No, I didn't make that up!  Or falling off of the toliet.  She is a never ending wealth of laughter and puzzlement.

Sometimes she does things that make me go, "Wow, my kid is a genius!"--like her ability to tell you the names and sounds of over 10 animals.

Then there are the times when I go, "Poor, kid!"---like when she got stuck in the laundry hamper and couldn't figure out how to get out.

There are other times that I laugh out loud at the things she says---she, for about three weeks would say "tank you, weecome" all in one breathe anytime somebody gave  her something.  Now she says it correctly but still says "La-Tue" for "love you and it melts my heart.

But most of all, when I think of my two year old (and my amazing 10 year old who has already passed the hilarious toddler stage!)  I think of how blessed I am.  And how I can't wait to see what they are going to do day to day!

BTW---funny two year old story for Sam (so he doesn't feel left out)---when he was two we were walking to the car on our way to day care.  There was a lizard (very small, green geiko) on the car.  Sam starts freaking out, screaming, "Addy-gader!  Addy-gader"!  I calmly explain to him that it is a lizard, not an alligator.  He calms down somewhat until we get in the car and he screams again.  I stop and turn around to see what is the matter.  He is holding his finger up and screaming, "The addy-gader! The addy-gader done bit me momma!"  And we heard about the addy-gator bite for weeks.  LOL!

Tata-
Manda

Beauty...

What makes a woman beautiful? Her body, her eyes, her hair, her clothes, her personality?  What is it that makes a woman pretty?

If we look at magazines, the "ideal" beauty for a woman is 5'8 and a size 2.  These women have lusterous hair, perfect skin and no flaws.  As you and I both know, very few of these women actually exist in the world outside of photoshopped photos in glossy magazines.  So if these women don't really exist, then why are these women what are society views as beautiful? 

As a fuller figured woman (polite way of saying fat) I am far from the "ideal".  I have carried two beautiful children in my belly and I have battle scars (stretchmarks) to show for it. 

I have a love of food.  All food.  And while I am not a glutton, I am not one to turn down a bite of something interesting or yummy.

I am not an exercise fiend.  This is something I am trying to get better at, not to reach an ideal of beauty but for my health.  I want to see my children grow up.   And eventually hold my grandchildren.

While I am not "ideal" I am hardly homely and/or ugly.  I take care of myself.  I wear nice clothes and style my hair.  SO why am I not considered beautiful by today's standards? 

I am caring and loving.  I love my friends and family fiercely and without fail.  I am an active and contributing member of society.  I am raising my children to be caring and conscious of others feelings.  I am a wife who is loyal to her husband.  I try to make a home for my family that is loving and supporting. But despite all of these attributes, I am not a size 6.  So therefore, by today's "ideal" I am not beautiful.  And neither are any of my wonderful friends and fellow mommies who don't fit the mold. 

What is wrong with our society?  What is happening? 

Beauty comes from within.  Outward beauty fades away.  It can be taken in the snap of a finger.  Just ask a women who has been scarred in a car accident.  But the beauty that matters, is the beauty that never fades, stretches or disappears.  It is the beauty found in a woman's heart.  It may not be ideal....but it is real.