I am not writing this to alienate any of my readers. I know that we all do not share the same faith. But my faith is such an important part of my life that I must address it.
I have been told by strangers that there is something "different" about me. There is some sort of unseen light that kind of comes through me. I am convinced that this is my faith in Christ shining through. Matthew 5:16 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.
I have also been asked, "How on earth can you praise a God that allows such terrible things happen?" I am reminded that without the bad we could never appreciate the good. If we never knew what sadness was, we could never enjoy happiness. If we always have plenty, we can never fully appreciate it, without first knowing what it is like to do without. Isaiah 25:1-4 1O Lord, thou art my God; I will exalt thee, I will praise thy name; for thou hast done wonderful things; thy counsels of old are faithfulness and truth. For thou hast made of a city an heap; of a defenced city a ruin: a palace of strangers to be no city; it shall never be built. Therefore shall the strong people glorify thee, the city of the terrible nations shall fear thee. For thou hast been a strength to the poor, a strength to the needy in his distress, a refuge from the storm, a shadow from the heat, when the blast of the terrible ones is as a storm against the wall.
I praise my Lord Jesus through it all. That doesn't mean that it is easy for me. There are times when I a get so angry at God and cry out, "WHY!!?" And just when I am at the point where I don't think I can take it anymore, His goodness and grace surrounds me and provides me with what I need. Sometimes He even provides me with something I didn't even know I needed. Phillipians 4:19 But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.
Sometimes I am overwhelmed and I have to remind myself to be still. To let my faith carry me. To realize that I, as a woman, cannot do it all. I have to depend on something bigger than myself.
I am a control freak, by nature! I feel completely out of control when I am not in control. It is something I have struggled with my entire life. I always have to be the best. The best dressed. The best student. The best wife. The best mother. You name it, I have to be the best. But the older I get the more I am reminded that the importance should not be placed on being the best, but trying my best. I may not always make the A or have children with perfect outfits and hair or be on every committee at my church and school and juggle it all with everything else, although I have tried!
What matters most is the love of Christ shining through me. Reaching out to everybody I meet. They may not agree with my faith, but they know it exists and are able to respect me for it. My faith in Christ is what has carried me all these years. Through the bad marriage, family strife, going back to school in my thirties, self doubt, self loathing, you name it, my faith will cover it.
I am not a mindless, shell of a person blindly following a demanding and judgemental God. I choose to follow my Lord. I made the decision on my own. I am at peace with my faith yet I am always wanting to learn more. Life is good. And so is the love of Christ!
I hope I haven't offended anyone. I just wanted to let everyone know how it feels to be a person totally in love with Christ and all His promises for me!
Ta-ta!
Manda
No comments:
Post a Comment